I really like traveling, especially when I’m traveling alone.

I’m not sure why, but whenever I travel with people, I feel limited in where I can go and what I can do: I need to be conscious about how much time is spent somewhere or else I’ll drag people behind or go too fast. I also feel a responsibility to take care of people traveling with me, at least to what I can do.  What do other people want to eat? Where does someone want to go? What is something we can all enjoy? etc. All these things limit my expectations on my travels.

Near the end of my senior year in college, I met with the staff who lead KCCC Santa Cruz and 2 other friends to have some sharing time at Chipotle. Even before this, during spring retreat, when all the graduating seniors who are graduating on time (4 years) were together, same question to me: “What kind of Christian would you want to become after you’re done with college?”

My answer: “a traveling Christian”

What does it mean to travel? I mean it to be both literally and spiritually as well. Literally traveling everywhere and tell people about Jesus to random people to random countries that I don’t know(literal traveling), and keep on moving towards God (spiritual traveling). Now spiritual traveling is simple for me to do, simple as in readily available for me by God’s grace. So what do I do with the physical part? It’s not really like I have money or anything, and I have to earn money to pay off student loans. Traveling is a long way off.

While I was job hunting as any normal recent college graduate would do, I got some interviews, but in the end, the jobs were offered to people who were more suited for the job. So randomly I saw a friend post on Facebook about a tutoring job, and I was curious so I asked about it. Maybe I could get the job early enough to earn money for vision conference? I thought, so I stepped right into the job.

It took a while to finish all the paperwork. By the time I go to my first student, the first pay day of the month is over, so the next day is on the 31st. Unless something out of the ordinary happens (Bank Error in my favor, collect $200), most likely I will not be able to afford to go.

Now, the main reason why I want to go to the conference is because I want to talk to some missionaries at the conference. I want to know how they got started and see what I can learn from them, or anything else God wants to reveal to me there. Everything seems so vague.  It’s almost like I was planning an appointment with God: “Hey God, you know that place? It’s pretty nice, I would like to meet you there.” (I didn’t really say it, but that’s how I see what I did)

God didn’t really need that place to meet me.

I still think it would still be nice for me to go, but it doesn’t matter as much.

It is really strange that this revelation came to me. Let’s talk about my job.

This tutoring job involves me going to people’s homes to tutor individually, and it’s free for the students. I get paid not much, but should be enough, and I’m contracted at least till the end of the school year (earlier I was challenged to pray for this “proverbs 30-7-9”, it works exceptionally well, not for the faint of heart).

Somehow I see this connection between going on missions in “East Asia”, the country with 1.6 billion people, and going to people’s house and tutoring. I’m not supposed talk about Jesus in tutoring sessions, it even says so on the employee handbook pdf. Just like “East Asia”.

My thought process: “But it’s ok to talk about your experiences? I mean it is tutoring, part of tutoring is sharing about your experiences when you were a student?” “Of course, ez”

Let’s see how the HS work now, I don’t expect me to be able to do anything. All I can do is pray.

Well, God took care of the literal traveling part, ez.

One step work in progress.

Now if only I have someone who will travel with me who can make me even more open…

I sure miss hostels. Waiting for summer already ~




Random thought of the day

When I play games online, I wonder what is going on in other people’s minds as they either: a) get owned Or b) owning. And some are douche, some are nice.

So are some of the comments I read from forums, comments, and blows.

The Internet is a place where people show their worst side and their best side.  Because of its anonymity, there are little consequences to Internet users.

It’s a pretty good place to get to know what the people you know truly are: their values, principles, personality. If it’s consistent with your view of what your friends are, good; those friendships will most likely last. But if what they do on the Internet is inconsistent with what they do on a daily basis, the so called “real world”, you really have to think about what kind of person those “friends” truly are. You may surprisingly agree with them, or you may surprisingly disagree with them. Either way, there are choices to be made. Do you want to get closer or do you want to get farther?

I think someone should do a study on people’s personality while they are online and find differences between that and so called “reality”. If only I’m a psychiatrist or something lol. For psych people, this is a good research topic.

Both the online world and “real world” are  reality. The people who interact with it are real.

Comment with 1,333 Words

Originally I wanted to comment on this, but it turned into an essay. So I replied to that article with this and elaborated on it + add economic arguments. I’m gonna post what I meant to post here. This is a very intense issue that needs to be addressed. Honestly, what I wrote is something I would consider heretical a few years back, but it’s something God revealed to me. It is pretty damn bloody offensive to lots of people, possibly including my own family. I’m very open to discussion, so hit me up.

Beginning of 1,333 Words

In the present day, though homosexuals cannot reproduce, they can adopt and create an imitation of the family of blood relations. So in the economic sense, there are little negative externalities other than the economic benefits that normally comes to a male-female marriage are withheld by the government and lawmakers.


It’s also economically inefficient for the government to act according to moral values, because unless everyone believes in the same moral standard it’s impossible for there to be a true and perfect verdict. It’s clear that people have different moral standards, this article wouldn’t be posted if we don’t. So our system of law should be based on economics, rather than morals, because money is the common denominator (it’s a sad common denominator our society have today).


Here is an example of why it’s economically inefficient to base on morals, and I believe most will cringe at this idea, if not all): If someone is murdered, the family experience loss of someone who can provide (income), loss of productivity from painful emotions (income), and loss of money spent on grave/lawsuit/possible debts incurred (money again), so in theory, loss of a loved one can be financially compensated in the long run. But somehow our system ignore all common economic theory and instead does 2 things: 1). kill the murderer (lose taxpayer money and potential economic gain in society) 2) spend taxpayer money that could have been used for something else and keep him, feed him, give him shelter, away from the people who actually work (lose more money than killing him).


And answering the question of this article, yes, homosexuality is a sin, just as much as deceit, greed, adultery, etc, especially PRIDE, the one sin that people (non-Christians) never accuse themselves of. People may say money is the root of all evil, but no, the real evil is pride. Pride is what changed Lucifer into Satan. Pride is what happened when Eve decided she knew better than God when she ate the forbidden fruit and when Adam decided to be passive (Adam did NOTHING to help Eve) and follow Eve’s decision rather than God’s command (Both big problems people have these days). It is PRIDE in morals that prevents giving rights to LGBT and treating them as second class citizen. It is PRIDE that causes wars (not the only reason but one of them). It is PRIDE that republicans want to screw everyone over other than the 1% and win control. It is PRIDE that people always want to get more stuff than others. It is PRIDE that some women decide their body and their future is somehow more important than the one inside of her (I know there are certain times like rape/ life threatening stuff, glad I ain’t a judge, God is, and will decide depending on the situation what is true).

[This is the part that I really need confirmation on]

But the point is this, although it is CLEARLY written in the Bible that acts of homosexuality are sin from both before Jesus and after Jesus, there are no words in the Bible at all that say (or somewhere along the lines of) “you shall impose what you know as right to those who do not know what is right”, Bible talks about proclaiming what is right by your lives, not by your control over other people, just as God gave us free will, even though he has absolute power to control us. Bible talks about many things about relinquishing rights as well: “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust.” (Mt.5:43-46), If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic.(Luke 6:29), and the most important one from Jesus’s example, who humbled himself from his glory, when he is GOD, relinquished his rights to die for people who hates him, his enemies. He died and resurrected to save not only the Jews, but to the non-Jews as well (Roman Empire at the time basically represents the world, and notice how Israel is the center of Eurasiafrica, so Gospel is spread because of another “coincidence”). The Bible also says “Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn’t do it, sins. (James 4:17). The theme of James Ch. 4 is submission to God’s will. This homosexuality issue is a very narrow line. [Is it good to impose our beliefs on people who don’t know the truth?] Change in behavior does not necessary mean change of heart. And why should Christians worry about anything other than do what God says?  (1. Love God 2. Love Neighbor = everyone else) Nowhere in the Bible does it say, “save your own life” or “protect your family”. The Bible’s most listed command is “Do not be afraid”, because God is in FULL control, even if it seems evil, the absence of good, keeps growing. I recommend any Christian to read Job, and notice how God set limits to what Satan can do. Unfortunately “Christian” conservative leaders do not live as the Bible says, (if I talk about democrats I would have to talk about abortion and I’m too exhausted to go there right now, but anytime someone uses God’s name for him/herself, please don’t follow them). If anyone is still reading, you must notice the change in how I wrote, I thought it was going to be short with a simple economic analysis. I hope this was not a waste of time writing this and shows what is really true. This is the first comment I wrote on HuffingtonPost because I felt bored, so maybe this is a good opportunity to write something that’s usually not seen nor heard of. Truth will always offend people.


And to get rid of bias as best as I can. I’m not gay, nor do I know any friends that are gay, nor I want to know any gay guy friends. (My pride is speaking: Please don’t hit on me). Not sure if I don’t want to give them opportunity to do more gay things or I’m just completely repulsed by the idea of someone doing gay things to me. Really there is no difference of severity of sin, but the feeling of someone gay hitting on me is like having someone throw feces at my face; I have to dodge it.


Summing up: 1) Government can’t really punish/prevent sin 2) All sins are equal 3) True Christians should live according to the Bible, not by their feelings of disgust or anything else. 4) Something I secretly inferred for those who are thinking about Nietzsche but I didn’t really go deep into it, good luck 5) Everyone needs Jesus. 6) Truth makes many enemies, even from people who are your family and friends. (This should sound familiar, if not, see Matthew 10:34-36)


I really don’t think I would be able to say all of the above to people I know, because they’re not ready for how intense this is, and I’m not a good speaker, but at least I wrote it out. I’m not anyone other than a follower/willful slave of Christ. I’m also unemployed almost employed freshly out of college. If I offend anyone, be offended, see why you’re offended, and see if your way is better than what God says. I’ll end with what Buddha said at his deathbed: “Behold now, bikkhus, I declare to you: all conditioned things are of a nature to decay. Strive on with earnestness.” (paraphrase: everything is going to decay, good luck and try hard). Or what Jesus said when he’s ascended to heaven: “18 Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” <-reason I wrote all this, please find truth if you dare.

End of 1,333 Words

So this is the second time I tried to post it up, because I somehow hit some key and everything got deleted. Other than the 1,333 words that I saved on MSWord, everything here is new. Basically, I think LGBT + the 1% are the prostitutes and tax-collectors of our day. Yet I have heard no one talk about this (except the person who blogged about this issue, who is the one who got me start to think about all this, he probably doesn’t even know that I read his blog. I just randomly saw his blog on Facebook and read it and didn’t follow him. His locked his blog now. It’ll be fun if he reads this. I hope he talks about this one day because he is certainly in a position to do so.) I think people really don’t talk or even think about this because people are not ready to hear nor change the perspectives that has been so ingrained in their minds. I really hope I can post this without fail like last time. The Word is a double-edged sword; it affects me just as much as it affects you who reads what I write. I don’t think I am ready to reach out to gay guys, nor I think I ever will, but supposedly God brings them to me, I’ll be ready, because God is good all the time and will never do things to harm me.

Omg… this is going to top 2,000 words.

My recent experiences: so after I came back from my missions trip, I really missed worshiping in song and being together with other bros and sis. Then I thought about why do I only go to church on Sundays? I mean we Christians are the church. Denominations are all human-made. The “Holy” way of worship is completely human concept. I understand that God set apart a day to make it Holy, but why not all days? Why not really be the church and live like how the Christians in Acts do: sharing everything, selling everything, no one was without anything they needed. Oh, right, communism, not going to fly, especially nowadays. Totally impossible is just what I think of right now this second, but then now that I really think about it, is it really impossible? Impossible is nothing. (reminds me from Korea Conference 불가능은 없다) 26 Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Not sure how it’s gonna fly, but it’s not really my concern. I went a little off track with my ideas here, the point is, as of now, it’s not possible for most people to live as a church, I don’t think any government would let that happen because it really is literally God’s kingdom on Earth, running on the Holy Spirit and God’s Word alone. What matters is I decided to go to two churches instead of just going to cornerstone.

So by being a newcomer, I remember how bloody weird it felt. I found that church playing with my Youversion bible app on my phone and clicked live, typed in 95148, south bay church, looked them up, see their doctrines, see their hours, decided to check them out.

I don’t think I ever was a newcomer because I always knew someone at church. This time was the first time I don’t know anyone. They’re a pretty recently made church from 2009 and they have some big plans for NorCal, like raising up new churches here, and getting people who don’t know Jesus to come. It’s a medium size church with 4 services 9am -1pm. They don’t have a lot going on, they basically divide it into 4 things, Sunday, kids, life group, n volunteer, they also partner with a church in Ethiopia and focus on them rather than doing everything.
But yeah I like big plans, especially when I know God is gonna make it rain revival in NorCal. So I’ll keep going there and see what I can do for them.

So yeah, if it’s weird for me, who’s been attending church for more than 12 years, it’s going to be bloody weird for non-Christians who know no one. So far I met got one guy’s number and met some people, probably can’t remember their names. It’s gonna be a lot more awkward for the “sinners” of our age. Please pray for them, yourself, those who teach, and me (not a teacher, at least for now).

And I’m tired now. There is so much more blessings God poured out on me that I cannot use mere words. Anyways, always remember to seek what is true, not abstractions, nor theories, but truth.

Oh and world is not ending in Dec 21, 2012, Source: “The hour and the date unknown” 36 “But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son,[a] but only the Father. written in the Bible. I write this so I can tag Apocalypse without sounding retarded and make random people see this.